I often speak of my dislike for Winnie the Pooh, Mickey and the like WHEN adults wear them on their clothes. If you enjoy wearing authorized Disney apparel, I don't mean to offend you. Love the sinner, hate the sin. I know my imperfect sense of fashion doesn't give me the right to cast a stone. But I'm not really trying to throw rocks here, I'm just saying I don't like it.
I also have a particular annoyance for the collection of teddy bears. I'm well aware I could be stirring up all sorts of controversy by saying so--There must be some serious teddy bear lovers out there if they can pay $80 and MORE for the things. Again, not casting stones...I just don't understand it.
Yesterday, I received a special Valentine catalogue for VERMONT TEDDY BEARS and apparently, teddy bears have a strange and magical power to, uh, "Make (Your) Heart Skip a Beat." The cover had 2 bears in their UNDERWEAR and 1 tantalizing question: Boxers or Briefs? Well obviously, that really set off my curiosity so I commenced exploration of the magazine.
Supposedly, if you give a girl one of these bears for Valentines this year, "She'll think of you everytime she takes her bear to bed" and "You'll get the reaction you're hoping for." If Brock got me one of these Teddy Bears for Valentine's Day, he'd get a reaction, alright, but it wouldn't be pleasant.
Some of these bears actually did remind me of some of you. They might not have done anything for me, but perhaps one of these bears will tickle YOUR fancy. To each his own! For you, one of these bears could be the promised gift of spice for your love life.
***I did NOT make up the names! Assume I chose all of these at absolute random.
"Let's Get Bear Naked" bear goes to Krystal.
To Ginnie goes the "Wild Playbear Bunny."
Lindsey, his name is not McDreamy, but "Loverboy." Look close, his tat says "LT."
Here's "Horny Devil." Emily Max, I believe he belongs to you.
Vanessa--I'm sorry but, I'm afraid I might forever remember Lee as his Halloween costume...It was too perfect.
You get "Red Hot Redneck" bear.
Amy, this might not do anything for you, but I'm thinking Daegan might like it. "Gone Fishing" bear.
Missy, meet "Mr. Right."
Kelsey gets "Handy Bear."
"Nurse Bear" is for Amy K P.
Erica gets the "Let's Monkey Around Bear"
Chelsie gets the dangerous and exciting "Lawyer" bear.
Better yet, Wylie and Laila get the "Accountant."
Rich and Tamara get "Latin Lover" bear.
Emily, "Love Rider" might pacify you until Luke buys you a motorcycle. Or you can give Luke "Motorcycle Mama" bear to inspire him to get you one soon.
Lindsay, it looks like "Gangster of Love" is carrying a violin in that case. He's got a song just for you...
To all my Colony friends, you are obviously attracted to men in scrubs. You each get "Scrubs Bear"
No one wants "Prince Charming." He's boring.
If I had to give one to Brock I guess he'd like "Super Lover" or "Country Lovin'"
If you weren't assigned a bear, and you want one, you can have "Stud Muffin."
I also have a particular annoyance for the collection of teddy bears. I'm well aware I could be stirring up all sorts of controversy by saying so--There must be some serious teddy bear lovers out there if they can pay $80 and MORE for the things. Again, not casting stones...I just don't understand it.
Yesterday, I received a special Valentine catalogue for VERMONT TEDDY BEARS and apparently, teddy bears have a strange and magical power to, uh, "Make (Your) Heart Skip a Beat." The cover had 2 bears in their UNDERWEAR and 1 tantalizing question: Boxers or Briefs? Well obviously, that really set off my curiosity so I commenced exploration of the magazine.
Supposedly, if you give a girl one of these bears for Valentines this year, "She'll think of you everytime she takes her bear to bed" and "You'll get the reaction you're hoping for." If Brock got me one of these Teddy Bears for Valentine's Day, he'd get a reaction, alright, but it wouldn't be pleasant.
Some of these bears actually did remind me of some of you. They might not have done anything for me, but perhaps one of these bears will tickle YOUR fancy. To each his own! For you, one of these bears could be the promised gift of spice for your love life.
***I did NOT make up the names! Assume I chose all of these at absolute random.
"Let's Get Bear Naked" bear goes to Krystal.
To Ginnie goes the "Wild Playbear Bunny."
Lindsey, his name is not McDreamy, but "Loverboy." Look close, his tat says "LT."
Here's "Horny Devil." Emily Max, I believe he belongs to you.
Vanessa--I'm sorry but, I'm afraid I might forever remember Lee as his Halloween costume...It was too perfect.
You get "Red Hot Redneck" bear.
Amy, this might not do anything for you, but I'm thinking Daegan might like it. "Gone Fishing" bear.
Missy, meet "Mr. Right."
Kelsey gets "Handy Bear."
"Nurse Bear" is for Amy K P.
Erica gets the "Let's Monkey Around Bear"
Chelsie gets the dangerous and exciting "Lawyer" bear.
Better yet, Wylie and Laila get the "Accountant."
Rich and Tamara get "Latin Lover" bear.
Emily, "Love Rider" might pacify you until Luke buys you a motorcycle. Or you can give Luke "Motorcycle Mama" bear to inspire him to get you one soon.
Lindsay, it looks like "Gangster of Love" is carrying a violin in that case. He's got a song just for you...
To all my Colony friends, you are obviously attracted to men in scrubs. You each get "Scrubs Bear"
If I had to give one to Brock I guess he'd like "Super Lover" or "Country Lovin'"
If you weren't assigned a bear, and you want one, you can have "Stud Muffin."
10 comments:
Swwet I get the stud muffin. okay this had me laughing the whole time. Glad to know you will still love me even if I wear my Looney tunes shirts from time to time.
I do love you Michelle!
I love it! I definitely think that my bear is the best. You are too funny!
Oh my gosh! Thank you! Since my own Loverboy is anti-V-Day, this will probably be the only gift I get. I'll squeeze the little furball tight.
Thanks for the lawyer bear, I am seriously considering it for Nate . . . gag!
I'm liking how Stud Muffin is conveniently covering his muffin with his Muffin.
And I have to disagree with Ginnie...you just can't compete with leather bras.
That is hilarious! Your posts are so funny. Who comes up with these things? Have you seen the decorative geese for your porch? You change their outfits with every holiday. Honestly! By the way, I agree with adults wearing Disney. Someone needs to call the fashion police.
Tyra, You are way too funny. And sweet to send us all such perfect little teddy bears. Did you know I collect bears? just kidding. Thanks for the thoughts, and for finding me the right bear. I think you could have gotten me a big elephant or hippo right now, since that is how I feel being 8 months pregnant. :)
Hey, I COLLECT BEARS! I know you probably didn't know. But it is the sad truth. But yes I have to agree, there is nothing I hate more than getting ugly (not only bears) but any stuffed animal for the girls. They go straight to the trash. But I have to admit my mother would get bears for me when I was younger (they're cute one though) whenever she went somewhere.
How fun and creative! Thanks for thinking of us.
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